Amsterdamned (Blue Underground Blu-ray Review)

Is Amsterdamned a Hidden Treasure or Dumpster Fire?

Blu-ray Distributed By: Blue Underground / August 29, 2017

The Danger Lies Just Below the Surface

Down in the murky depths of Amsterdam’s famous canals lurks a murderous predator. Surfacing at night, he kills at random and disappears without a trace. As the bodies begin to pile up and mass hysteria envelopes the city, Detective Eric Visser is assigned to head the investigation. With only the escalating number of victims to go on, Visser pursues his quarry with a vengeance, unaware that his beautiful new girlfriend may be the mysterious killer’s next victim.

Huub Stapel (THE LIFT) and Monique van de Ven (TURKISH DELIGHT) star in this pulse-pounding thriller written and directed by Dick Maas (SILENT WITNESS), highlighted by an explosive speedboat chase through the city’s narrow canals. Long unavailable on U.S. home video, Blue Underground proudly presents AMSTERDAMNED in a brand-new 2K restoration from the original Dutch negative, approved by Dick Maas!

Trashmen Rubbish Round Table

Jimbo

Well, this discussion is going to be less of a round table and more of a chit-chat since Travis and Craig were unavailable for the screening. Craig was busy watching Avengers: Infinity War. I have no idea what Travis was up to. So Jamie, what did you think of Amsterdamned? (Oh, and minor spoilers are peppered throughout)

Jamie

Yeah, overall I am pretty disappointed. It started off as a promising slasher film with a killer traveling through water. But it just turned into a preposterous and boring cop thriller. Big letdown.

Jimbo

There’s just so much to unpack here for our readers…

I’ll start by expressing that I was also disappointed, and I think even more so than you, perhaps. The reasons being: 1) I really like Dick Maas’ Freshman effort The Lift, which I also reviewed for Trashmen. But also 2) Dick Maas turned down the directing job for A Nightmare on Elm Street 4 to do Amsterdamned. So I expected a lot!

Now, hindsight being 20/20, I should have been a little more apprehensive because his film Down (an Americanized remake of The Lift) proved to be a fucking mess. But I didn’t consider it as part of the equation because Down is a “Hollywood” film where Amsterdamned represented one of his “independent” horror films.

Considering all of this, logic would dictate that Amsterdamned would be awesome. After all, the guy turned down a Freddy Krueger movie. Who would do that unless their movie was going to be amazing? Right?!

Jamie

The first kill of a prostitute was awesome. Her body is hung upside down and is dragged across a traveling tour boat. I thought that was a great hook and I was really into the movie. Unfortunately as it went along the film focused on too many characters and various red herrings. I slowly stopped caring and got antsy.

Jimbo

Well, before I get into what I didn’t like I’ll start with what I did like about Amsterdamned…

The city atmosphere and the look of Amsterdam. I think Maas and team do a great job of capturing the essence of the city. I even made a comment to you about the city looking great and expressing interest in visiting. Then you made some crass joke about weed. But that aside, one of the biggest appeals for me watching these older movies is the time capsule effect. It’s like a window into another time not so far gone.
The underwater killer. I really dig the idea, even if the execution feels a little clunky and preposterous at times. But Maas stages most of his scenes near the canals with the camera fairly close to the water. Just like Spielberg did with Jaws, the audience gets that same squeamish feeling being just above the surface. We can’t see what is below.
The acting. I think all of the performances are pretty good. I enjoyed Huub Stapel in The Lift and I think he’s pretty good here as Detective Eric Visser. And Monique van de Ven does fine as love interest Laura. Even the actors playing the supporting characters are performed well, even if many of the characters are superfluous (but more on that later).
Action! The chase scenes, especially a long and complicated boat chase through canals, were all choreographed, filmed, and edited very effectively. Maas put a lot of his time and effort into these sequences and the work shows! There’s also a really good car chase through the tiny streets of Amsterdam that felt very dangerous. It was all very exciting.
The opening kill. You already mentioned it, but the hooker being killed and dragged across the top of a boat in front of a school of screaming children puts an exclamation point on the movie. From that point on the tone is set. We’re expecting things to get even crazier. Unfortunately, most of the movie does not live up to the expectations of this early sequence…

Jamie

I agree with you on what works. I like the idea of the underwater killer. But like you said, while watching the film suddenly this killer has super human strength that can drag people straight into the water and with such force. They barely have time to scream. And what about the main protagonist’s daughter who was friends with a psychic kid? That never went anywhere.

Jimbo

You raise a handful of plot holes and loose ends. I believe Maas never stopped long enough to consider these questions because he was…

Too focused on technical achievements. I praise the film for the stunts and chase sequences, but the blu-ray’s “Making of” documentary showcases how tunnel-visioned Maas became. He lost focus on what made the story better, and became obsessed with technical perfection. During one interview, Maas comments that he couldn’t bear to cut out one scene because of the amount of work put into a technical effect. Nevermind that the scene may hurt the film’s story or pacing. They worked hard and it cost money so it had to stay in. I’m certainly sympathetic to this dilemma but sacrificing the story for budget or effect ultimately hurts the overall product.

Jamie

Now the stunts were decent and well directed. The boat chase was great and kudos to director Dick Maas for directing such intense and detailed stunts. That actually woke me up a little. I admit to dozing off at one point for a few minutes. Maas is a good director for action / stunt sequences. Now his writing skills…dear God, keep him away from a script. Poor dialog, overlong and at times borderline silly. Too many characters too.

Jimbo

I’m glad you mention writing. That brings me to my next point…

Story cohesion (writing?) and editing. Maas can’t bring himself to trim the fat on the technical scenes. He also fails to trim down irrelevant scenes and characters. I know you don’t like the writing, but I would suggest that maybe Maas has more of an editing problem. Characters and scenes that may have worked well on the page don’t translate well into film.

I’ll cover three examples:

You mentioned Detective Visser’s daughter (Anneke Visser played by Tatum Dagelet), so let’s start there. Like you said, what is the purpose of introducing the Detective’s daughter and her stupid psychic play pal Willy? They’re never in peril. They don’t uncover any major clues to help break the case. What is their function or purpose in the story? If you can’t answer that, the whole subplot should be excised completely.
And what about the scene with two policemen patrolling the canals on a boat? There’s a nervous young officer afraid of noises in the dark. Even after his elder partner tells him to calm down, the younger officer fires several shots into the dark water indiscriminately. The pay off? He kills a duck. End of scene, we never see these guys ever again. And that scene probably lasted at least 5 minutes.
You also mentioned there being “too many characters”. I think I know what you mean. Maas would introduce a character that we know nothing about. Then the killer would murder them for no apparent reason except, horror movie! Then we move onto the next scene. Right? No time getting emotionally invested in any of these people. That could work if the film was leading us closer to something. Or is it?

Jamie

I forgot about that pointless scene of the cops on the boat resulting in some duck death. I still think the writing is subpar and cliche at times. The whole cop formula was in full strength at the time this was made. I also agree the film needs to be edited down. Clocking in at almost two hours, this could be a tight 90 minute thriller, in the style of a Giallo film. Oh, and how about that ending? WTF??

[MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD – Scroll down to avoid]

Jimbo

Oh yes, The “twist”. You mention the “red herrings”. Red herrings are great if you’re building an honest to goodness mystery. Except he isn’t. Our characters are spending all of their time investigating a crime and of all their suspects who turns out to be the killer? Fucking Cropsey from The Burning. At least it may as well be Cropsey because the villain isn’t ever established in any tangible way in the narrative. Maas just decides, “Fuck it! Let’s throw in a deformed mutant at the end. He can be the killer”. And don’t try to tell me that Maas “introduced” the character in a photograph that the camera dollies past. That’s bullshit! Does Detective Visser at least gets a thrilling fight with the killer in an effort to save daughter/girlfriend/someone? Nope! Cropsey pulls a nice gun (R. Budd Dwyer style) and puts a harpoon through the face. No showdown. Mystery solved, I guess. It feels like such a cheat.

Jamie

The ending was a pure cheat. Just a “How do I end this movie? Um…this burned guy, fuck it.” And no final conflict with the main character or the villain? While that is a little original, it was still awful. There was no build up or backstory with this villain that we spent two hours watching. Maybe if there was in the final moments some hint or tease that maybe the killer wasn’t really him? It would probably still be lame.

[SPOILER FREE]

Jimbo

We’ve been pretty critical of Amsterdamned but did I hate it? Absolutely not. I find that I’m being a little more critical of the film because I had higher expectations. I think Maas is a very talented filmmaker and I believe he’s gotten lost in the shuffle of the industry. He’ll forever have to live with the regret of turning down A Nightmare on Elm Street 4. Instead of Dick Maas moving on to direct big budget actioners, the world got Renny Harlin instead. Given the choice, I’d wager Dick Maas could have done better.

Jamie

Funny you mention Renny Harlin. Imagine what Maas could have done with Cliffhanger, another Harlin flick. I guess that really has nothing to do with what we are discussing, aside from Maas can shoot action / stunts pretty well.

Jimbo

I know Renny Harlin has nothing to do with this film, but I do think the discussion is relevant. If history had been kinder, more people would know who Dick Maas is. He’s certainly no better or worse than Harlin. And thanks to Blue Underground maybe more people will discover Maas. Because of Blue Underground’s releases I have seen THREE of Maas’ films now. And since I’m already throwing props toward Blue Underground, it’s worth noting that Amsterdamned, The Lift, and Down function as a great trilogy in their catalog.

Jamie

How did you like the transfer? Blue Underground continues to impress and I thought the “version two” blu ray that Blue Underground sent to me looked really slick. I know you have the “version one.” How did it look for you? Was there any smearing that folks had complained about before Blue Underground offered a corrected version?

Jimbo

Regarding the transfer, yes I screened Blue Underground’s first pressing before they issued the corrected discs. I personally didn’t notice anything out of sorts, but I wasn’t exactly watching with the same critical eye that others might.

Jamie

I thought it sounded great too and loved that viewers can watch the film dubbed or subtitled in the original Dutch language.

The special features are also top notch – audio commentary, vintage making of (mostly centered on the boat chase) interviews with Huub Stapel and stunt coordinator Dickey Beer (fake name?) Did you watch the music video or trailers?

Jimbo

The disc is loaded with stuff no one asked for but proved really interesting and insightful. The only thing that started to feel a little repetitive was the interview with stunt coordinator Dickey Beer (yes, that sounds fake as hell). Some of his interview repeated what was in the vintage “making of”.

The interview with Huub Stapel is good, but if you want the “complete” interview you need to own both Amsterdamned and The Lift.

All in all, the movie is too long, but it’s still a good time waster. I put it on the same level as slasher flicks like Terror Train or Hell Night.